“Mom, have I ever been bitten by a whale?” -Evelyn, 5
(Said in a totally matter of fact tone, like, “have I had stitches?” Answer: no. This is highly unlikely. Also we live in Michigan. Where even is the nearest whale?)
“It would be hard to lick a squid because they have ink defense.” -Orion, 6
(Is that the only thing holding you back from licking a squid? I feel like you need to reevaluate your priorities if this is the case.)
“Dere is a wego up my nose.” -Jocelyn, 3
(Five minutes of restrained panic and resigned realization that an emergency room was in our future to remove the wego/Lego later:)
“Is okay. I sneezed. Look, it’s here in the snot.”
All in all, a good day.